Do you know what happens when you combine absurdity with popular culture? You get the holiday season! Nothing says “here’s a gift” quite like giving somebody a gift. If you’ve got some friends with silly senses of humor, then check out some of the weird things you can purchase on the internet! Okay, buy them and keep them for yourself. Who are we going to tell?
“Smells Like Keanu Reeves” Candle
There is, of course, no empirical evidence to support the claim that Keanu Reeves exudes the same aroma as this candle. But isn’t this what we want The Nicest Man in Hollywood to smell like? Redolent of mahogany and teakwood, like a bookcase made of incense. Earthy and slightly mysterious, this candle is careful not to touch you in photographs so it doesn’t get slammed with allegations of sexual impropriety. Set this candle next to your collection of John Wick movies and call it Baba Yaga! We’re sure that Keanu Reeves and this candle both smell quite nice. If Keanu isn’t quite your style, then you may enjoy this Danny DeVito candle. Maybe not. We’re not your nose.
Order the “Smells Like Keanu Reeves” candle here.
LEGO Infinity Gauntlet
Thanos was arguably the biggest bad in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Now you can have a LEGO model of his life-altering Infinity Gauntlet, complete with Infinity Stones, for your very own! Some assembly is required. It’s a LEGO toy, so pretty much all assembly is required. Threaten your neighbors with cosmic vengeance when they play their music too loud! Remember, if you use this model to do The Snap, it will probably fall apart. Do you want to put this whole thing back together? No, we don’t think we will.
Order the LEGO Infinity Gauntlet here.
“You’re My National Treasure” Nicolas Cage Mug
More iconic than Santa Claus himself, no one embodies the holiday season quite like Nicolas Cage. [Editor’s Note: That isn’t true.] This ceramic and potentially magical mug is perfect for coffee, tea, or drinking yourself into an alcoholic stupor in Las Vegas. You can even hide a tiny version of the Declaration of Independence inside the mug! Nicolas loves you, all of you, and this mug will reinforce that powerful message every time you use it.
Order your Nicolas Cage “You’re My National Treasure” mug here.
Creepy Twins Ornament
Perfect for the possessed and actively psychotic writer in your life, this ornament will be sure to terrify the squeamish people in your circle. While the description doesn’t specifically say who the twins are, we have an idea. They’re the [redacted] twins from that book by [redacted]. You know, the one in the [redacted] hotel? This gift would look perfect hanging from a tree, dangling from the rearview mirror of your car, or sitting peacefully on a bench inside of a hedge maze. Get one now or run the risk of being corrected!
Order your Creepy Twins ornament here.
