This week, the Guardians of the Galaxy meet the Inhumans. We get a history lesson, a betrayal, and despite the musical and leading title, only a cameo by Crystal. Meet me after the jump for my thoughts on “Crystal Blue Persuasion.”
We’ve done this dance before, though not necessarily in this particular venue. The Inhumans have featured prominently on “Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.” We have yet to meet the Inhuman Royal Family of Black Bolt, Medusa, Crystal, Gorgon, Karnak, Triton, and Lockjaw in the hidden city of Attilan, but we have met Inhumans. One would assume the Royal Family is being saved for the feature film The Inhumans a few years down the road.
We have met those who were thousands of years previous genetically manipulated by the Kree, who calling themselves the Inhumans and are now in hiding. Exposure to the terrigen mist and the terrigen crystals have given them phenomenal powers beyond normal humans. Of course, on the TV series, we are only seeing the tip of the iceberg. In this episode of “GotG” we’re seeing the originals, the Royal Family created by Stan Lee and Jack Kirby back in the day.
We have gone over who the Inhumans are in the Marvel Television Universe (and by design, the Marvel Cinematic Universe) but not the Marvel Animated Universe. Much like the Guardians of the Galaxy themselves, the Inhumans have appeared in different forms in different venues of the MAU, which again brings up the idea that the Guardians are off by themselves, or a dream, or a fantasy.
These Inhumans, the Royal Family specifically, have been infected with a plague that grows terrigen crystals on their bodies, causing illness, and eventual crystalline forms as seen in the Alpha Primitives. Black Bolt decided that the best way to deal with this malady was to launch the whole city of Attilan into space in hopes that the Kree might have a cure for them. Right, that’s logical. Just for the record, although the Kree did create the Inhumans, they have always considered them weapons or slaves, not a good relationship.
The Story and the Sitcom
In the midst of Star-Lord trying to teach his shipmates how to play baseball, Lockjaw teleports in and takes the ball before bopping back and kidnapping Quill and Gamora. The baseball thing, sigh, is what used to be called back in the silver age of sitcoms, the B (or C) plot. It was used often in shows like “The Brady Bunch” to shine a spotlight, even if for comic relief, on characters not used in the A plot. It was usually branded by silliness and most often starring Cousin Oliver. Again, sigh, “Guardians of the Galaxy” is too cool to have a Cousin Oliver. Much like the bit with Drax’s cooking last time, we didn’t need it.
Once everyone was on board Attilan, I kinda dug the dual telling by Medusa and Maximus of the Inhumans’ backstory, cleverly done. And Maximus the Mad is the star here voiced by Diedrich Bader, bravo. The properties of the crystals vs. those of the CryptoCube and the Cosmic Seed don’t really make much sense, but let’s face facts, has the Cosmic Seed plot made much sense from the get-go? What counts is we get to see Black Bolt in action. Oh, what’s that you say? The Guardians were there too? I couldn’t tell. Let’s hope things get better next time…