Statham vs Renner – Biff Bam Pop’s Box Office Predictions

Three new releases want your money and they want it now! Or, at least sometime over the next three days. Will any of them come out on top? Here’s our predictions:

First up is Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters, staring Jeremy Renner and Gemma Arterton as the title siblings, who after escaping that original witch in the children’s fable, wind up as bounty hunters whose main purpose is the extermination of witches. My Gaya, this sounds awful. I don’t know how Renner got tossed into this one, especially after great roles in franchise flicks like Mission: Impossible, The Avengers and the Bourne films. However, this is the kind of no-brain flick that might go down well in the winter. Look for Hansel and Gretel to score a first place debut with $18 million, regardless of its quality.

Parker stars Jason Statham as the beloved literary badass in an adaptation of Flashfire, the 19th Parker novel from Donald Westlake (under the pen name Richard Stark). The character has been on the big screen before, usually with his name changed, most recently in the awesome Mel Gibson film Payback. With Jennifer Lopez co-starring, Parker could find a larger audience than your typical Statham beat em ups. The film should debut in second place with $13 million.

The final new entry is Movie 43, an anthology comedy staring a whole bunch of A-list stars, including Hugh Jackman, Emma Stone, Kate Winslet, Gerard Butler and many others, and directed by twelve different directors, including Bret Ratner, James Gunn and Elisabeth Banks. The film is being compared to films like Kentucky Fried Movie and Amazon Women On The Moon in terms of execution. The previews I’ve seen look damn funny, but I don’t think the film has been marketed well enough to find a mass audience. Look for a fifth place finish with $9 million.

As for the rest of the top five, Mama will grab third place with $11 million, while Zero Dark Thirty will be close behind in fourth place with $10 million.

So, to recap, here are our predictions:

1) Hansel and Gretel – Witch Hunters: $18 million
2) Parker – $13 million
3) Mama – $11 million
4) Zero Dark Thirty – $10 million
5) Movie 43 – $9 million

Be sure to check back on Sunday to see how the weekend turns out!